Chewing The Bits & 69

Hide yo' wife. Hide yo' kids!  We're gonna talk about sexy things!

I'll get right to the point; I'm not the biggest fan of oral. I don't mind giving it, even though I have a small mouth and jumpy gag reflex. All in all my biggest issue with people chewing on each other bits comes down to two things - smell and cleanliness.

Worries about cleanliness, etc. gets in the way of enjoyment for me. And don't even TRY to go any further. As I once said to a good friend of mine, "What is it with people and butt stuff!?"

I think most men are into both receiving as well as giving. And that's cool. My Special Man Friend ("MSMF") is no exception. I think I hurt some feelings early on in our relationship when I turned MSMF down from going down. Since then, muff rejection has come up off and on. More or less poking fun and teasing between one another.

One morning while cuddling in bed MSMF nonchalantly asked me, "Would you like me to chew on your muff?" Slightly laughing and not wanting to hurt any feelings I blurted out,

"Just because you don't chew on my muff all the time doesn't mean I love you any less."

We both died laughing. We still laugh about it.

Every blue moon one of us will proposition a muff meal and we both chuckle at the teasing.

Continuing with our little inside joke, the other morning while holding MSMF I asked him, "You want to chew on my muff?" Both laughing, I decided to double-down. "No? A little 69 then?" Rolling over, MSMF gave me the usual "Babe!" Out of nowhere he suddenly urged me, "Scratch! Scratch!" While vigorously scratching his back my back got jealous. "Babe, itch itch!"

Laying there, facing each other, we were viciously going to work scratching up each others backs. Moaning, left, right, up downing, and oh yeah-ing each other, I couldn't help but blurt out "This is some good 69." MSMF even took it further by flipping the other way, to do a true 69 back scratch though it wasn't as good.

69. The new back scratch position. Who knew?

And remember dear reader, just because you don't chew on my muff all the time doesn't mean I love you any less.